I am a college graduate. I had some pride in that accomplishment. I worked my tail off to pay my part of my education and still remember, very clearly, the stress that accompanied that work ethic. I worked 4 jobs the summer after my freshman year and wished I had understood the swift-heading-of-the-dollars-toward-the-drain that would ensue upon my first day on campus. I had no clue. Then, I did that which I had avowed never to do—I sat out a semester at home and worked my tail off again. In doing so, I opened the door to a teeny amount of financial looseness (I wouldn’t call it freedom) that enabled me to work at a camp for teenagers the summer following my junior year. How could I have known that is was there, receiving a biweekly paycheck of less than $200, that I would find my calling in life? How could I have known that the thing I love most doesn’t require a degree in any fashion?
Yet without the physical move to South Carolina
And so my degree was merely a means of getting me to the place I needed to be. It doesn’t matter what the degree is in; it could be accounting, teaching, business, home ec, or history. It’s a moot point. The point is that I was physically in the stepping-stone-place to the place that showed me my true passion.
But my degree is in creative writing. And I’m looking for a job. Not a writing job. An office job. A nanny job. A waitress job. Possibly even against a warehouse job. I’ve done them all before. Not a single one requires ‘further education’. Not one of those employers needs to see that $50,000 piece of paper that I haven’t touched since the day I got it (over 4 years ago!). Not one of those jobs gives two hoots about my GPA or extracurricular activities. Not a one.
Sometimes I struggle with feeling inferior to who-knows-who/what because I’m not using my degree. Because I’m looking for a job that, technically, a highschool graduate could get. Because I tend toward blue collar work that pays hourly and doesn’t really have benefits. (Oh yeah…I should probably locate some benefits.) But anytime I review the last 8 years of my life, I reach the beautiful, consistent, joyful truth that God directed every single step of my living process. He didn't make one mistake and He used and is using every choice that I made along the way, good and bad, all for His greater good. (I mean, that's part of why I serve this God!)
I think I could change Proverbs 3:5-6 ever so slightly to say, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart. Lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him; and check out what He did?!-He directed your path! And He ain't stopping now!"
I just love God and the way He works. I kinda love having no clue about what He is doing. Because knowing that He's totally got this lends itself to peace and adventure. The adventure of my life continues!
I still don't have a job...and this post is full of loose ends about my passion...more on that later...
